Hey...anybody there????

Whew... I guess I can start blogging again. Not that I don't want anyone reading...if that were the case, I would just journal. But then you have the problem that you might be even more personal and graphic or too open about stuff in a private hand written journal and THEN you are killed in a tragic farming accident and THEN someone finds your journal hoping to find some wonderful insights for your eulogy. Well, then you open a whole new can of worms that you can't close because your dead. So I guess I will blog with the mindset of this: Those who mind what I write don't matter and those who matter don't mind what I write.

May I honor God in all that I say and do (and write). And that starts from my heart and my head. And as long as those two are in sync and trying to align with God's will, I should be okay! :-)

Since we last "chatted," so much has happened: Steve passed his 6 month post cancer check up with flying colors, Steve applied for and got accepted to be a College ROTC Commander (In Nebraska, no less), we became the parents of a teenager, we took the kids on a trip of a lifetime to Walt Disney World with some wonderful friends, celebrated the birth of our Savior, started a new year and Steve passed his 9/10 month post cancer check up, again, with flying colors. Now it's February and time seems to be flying at record speed. In just a few months we will be saying good-bye to the 331st TRS and an awesome command tour. And then heading to yet another command tour (kind of a rarity in Steve's career field) and thinking of settling down.

I have been wishing away my time and it has become oh so apparent in the last several weeks, thinking that each new wish/step would make things easier - I could relax. I started last fall by wishing to find out if Steve made ROTC command, he did. Then I wished to find out where we would be going and hoping it was to NE, we did and we are. Then I started house hunting on-line and wishing we could find a house, we go next month. And now, I keep telling myself, "If only the closing was behind us and the boxes were unpacked." God has been very active in all this...not by granting me my wishes like a fairy Godmother, but by showing me what I have been or will be missing if I don't live in the present. And I have missed a lot and yet I am not relaxed one bit. In fact, I think I am more spun up than usual! If worrying were a work out regimen, I would have to eat more to keep my weight up.

I guess I should start by getting my priorities in order. Okay - the beauty of a blog (or a journal) is that I can sit here for a minute, 10 minutes or 10 hours before I put the next thought on paper/screen. Unless I told you, you would never know. Well, now you know. Cuz that's what I am doing now. I am sitting here trying to figure out what I am REALLY supposed to be doing. What is my job/priorities and what are God's? And is it okay for me to be thinking of what God is or is supposed to be doing. Does that make sense? At what point am I no longer just sitting and taking all of God in? When is it okay to get up and do? God has a house out there for us, but at what point to make the effort to find it? He has the ability to drop it in our laps, but will He? Should I wait for that? At what point am I supposed to use the resources given me?

I guess if I get in the Word more, I might have those answers. Since I am not currently in a Beth Moore study, I find that I fall away from scripture... not cool. But I am thankful for the Andy Stanley series that we just finished in SS, I am thankful for Andy's downloadable sermons, I thankful for the new Galatians study we are doing, I am thankful for Pastor Craig's downloadable sermons and his bible challenges (reading about the 7 deadly sins) - all things that are pulling me back to the Word. And I am very thankful for my Thursday & Friday morning drives to the base. God & I have some wonderful conversations! Am also thankful for my bluetooth (it keeps me from looking like a babbling idiot behind the wheel of the car).

Well, I guess I need to go downstairs and read day 3 about envy. I really need that now.

Peace (and contentment) to all who read...